Wednesday, February 27, 2013

You asked me what?

Dear Pretend Goddess,
I have been dating a great guy for over six months. He's met my parents but I haven't met his. Normally, I wouldn't think anything of it because his family lives out of town. However, his parents have visited at least three times and never a mention of an introduction. They're coming for a visit next month and I think I should meet them. I do have thoughts that he's the one but when he is keeping an important part of himself hidden from me, I think perhaps I'm not his one. 

A Well, You may not be his one. I do think that if he's met your parents, then you should meet his. Or do I really think that? Hmm. I'm not sure. If you pushed your parents on him two weeks after your first week together then I'd tell your boyfriend to run for the hills. If that's not the case and well, even if that were the case, the man is still with you. 
Have you asked why you haven't met his parents? When he plans on making such an introduction? Without knowing the full relationship I can only make assumptions. Maybe he felt he met your parents too soon, he moves at a different pace, doesn't want his girlfriend to meet his parents until the relationship reaches a certain level, OR you're not the one and he's keeping you around for the sake of just dating you. 
I'm not saying it's the last one. Ask him. A heads up though, evasive answers tend to be more telling than not. Do not come at him with guns firing though and don't sound accusatory. For example, "You've met my family. Why haven't I met yours?" "Am I not important enough to you?" 
You know the real question is if you're the one for him. Does your boyfriend see a future with you? And it makes you think not, when he doesn't make the parental introductions. 
So calmly (I beg), ask. At a certain age and any age, your time is more valuable and it isn't fair for it to be wasted by someone who doesn't see or know if there is a future. However, if you're say in your twenties, then relax. You don't need to be thinking about "the one" yet. 
I assure you after six months though, he knows where the relationship is going or where it won't be going. Understand? Again, calmly ask. If the answer is what you want to hear, then let him know that you'd like to meet his parents. do I put this delicately?...don't be that girl. Try not to come across as the desperate girl who just wants to get to the altar. 

Q I'm thinking of getting eye lash extensions. What are your thoughts about them? 

A Not a huge fan of them as an everyday look. I can tell more times than not when someone has eyelash extensions. You don't want people to know you're wearing fake lashes. Well, maybe you do but you shouldn't. If you're getting them for a special event or if you really don't have any lashes then I'll give you my go ahead. Otherwise, I don't like them. If you must, get the "mascara look." Stay away from the dramatic or extreme looks. Too intense looking and quite frankly, will cheapen your look. 
There are products that your doctor can prescribe if you are lacking in the lash department. Talk to your doctor about your options. You'll save money in the long run. 
Now, when you go to your spa for those fake lashes, please bring a picture of Jennifer Love Hewitt with you. Let your technician know you don't want that look. 
*If you are an escort, showgirl, "dancer," or don't have any lashes, then by all means carry on with those extensions. 

Jennifer Love Hewitt's tarantula eyes

 I'm a brunette and thinking of going blonde for the Spring and Summer. I can't afford to go to a salon every month for the upkeep. I'm going to color it myself at home. What at home color kits do you recommend?

A I don't. If you can't afford to maintain, don't do it. You're not just talking about coloring, you're talking about bleaching. That's a whole different game.
Leave it to the professionals. You'll fry your hair and cause serious breakage if you don't know what you're doing. If you have to ask which "kits" to use, you don't know what you're doing. It's a process to go from dark to light. 

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Top Hand Cream Picks

I don't know about you, but I hate hand cream that leaves my hands greasy or a cream that leaves a sticky film. I want a hand cream that absorbs quickly and moisturizes my wintry, thirsty skin leaving it soft. 
I've tested many brands from local drugstores to beauty and department stores. 
I must say, I was more disappointed than not while testing drugstore brands. I always want to find the most economical brands to recommend. I always say, there are products that are worth the splurge and others that are not. Regarding your skin, more times than not, I'll recommend that is where to splurge. 
Fear not though, I did find a few budget-friendly hand creams available at a drugstore that are worth my recommendation. I was very specific with what I was looking for while testing. 
A lot of creams that didn't make the cut, such as Eucerin Original, that I know from research as highly reviewed surprised me. I didn't like it all that much. It came out thick and left my palms greasy. I find if I have to wipe my palms dry after use, then it defeats the purpose of the cream. I will give it a whisper of praise because I can tell that it would heal very dry hands. Though it takes time for the cream to properly absorb and leaves hands a bit sticky, therefore causing me to not give it my full recommendation. 
When I have to spend minutes massaging a lotion into my hands, it's a no for me. They may heal dry, chapped skin but I assure you, there are better ones on the market that aren't so time consuming. Perhaps if I'm sitting in front of the TV with nothing to do I would consider such a lotion. Well, considering I now have a drawer of such creams, I may return to them when I run out of my favorites that are listed below.

Budget-friendly hand creams (prices vary depending where purchased):
I must note that most of these creams can be purchased in travel sizes. I highly recommend that while testing products. 


*Cetaphil. I'd say out of all drugstore lotions/creams, Cetaphil is my favorite. I'm not a fan of scented hand creams and if there is one it mustn't be a detectable fragrance or so incredibly subtle that my super sniffer isn't offended. Because my hands tend to be drier during colder months, I may add a very small drop of avocado oil or grape seed oil to cream when applying before bed. 

*Dove. If your hands are dry and need extra care, this is a good one for the price. However, and this goes with most hand creams, a little does go a long way. Repeat that sentence to yourself. Start with a dime-sized amount (with any brand) and increase depending upon desired amount. This one does tend to leave hands with that greasy feeling if too much is applied. 

*Neutrogena Norwegian Fast Absorbing Hand Cream. I like this one and I also like the original formula. Though I must add that you need very little of the original. It is heavier. At first I was unsure if I would like this one but my hands were smooth and soft the next morning. When I applied cream my hands and cuticles were dry. 




*Bliss High Intensity hand cream & Clinique's deep comfort hand and cuticle cream are hands down my two favorite hand creams. As long as I'm able, I will always splurge on one of the two. They moisturize incredibly well and I love how soft they leave my hands. Fantastic. 
I feel as though people have forgotten about Clinique. For a time, I did. If I may add a little side note, I still like Clinique pressed-powder. Do the Clinique sales associates still wear those white lab coats? I'll have to check as I purchased the cream online. Curious. 
Bliss High Intensity hand cream does have a scent but I don't find it offensive in the least. It won't interfere with any other scent you may have on. 

*L'Occitane Shea Butter Hand Cream. This is a great hand cream. In fact, I love it. This is definitely a cream where a little would go a long way. My hands felt soft and passed my test of lasting hours without having to reapply. 
With that said, it's not worth the price. I can justify splurging on the Bliss one, especially during the colder months. Bliss works just as well, maybe better. I think the Clinique one is slightly overpriced but it's amazing and I'd rate it the same as Bliss in terms of effectiveness. Remember, if you use a small amount (as you should), it will last longer. 

*AHAVA Mineral Hand Cream. This is a hand cream that truly delivers. It does have a slight scent but like Bliss' scent, it is not offensive and won't interfere with other scents. The only reason why I don't like AHAVA as much as Bliss' or Clinique's is because I had to reapply it more often. Of course after washing hands you may need to reapply cream and during the winter months, you'll find your hands need more moisture. I found that I needed to reapply AHAVA randomly throughout the day, more so than usual, and that was annoying for me. This was disappointing because the cream did make my hands soft and healed a dry patch I had on my hand. 

*Kiehl's Ultimate Strength Hand Cream. This is the cream if your hands are very dry. If I were exposed to harsher conditions and were harder on my hands, I would use this daily. It is for the very dry and it truly works.