Friday, March 29, 2013

Oh, the things you ask







Dear Pretend Goddess, 
I'm getting married in a few months. Should I have my rings soldered together before or after the wedding? I don't want to part with my engagement ring even for a week. Argh, the stress of weddings.

A I'm not into soldering rings together because I'm not....well, let me try to be as sensitive as possible. The answer is, neither. Don't solder your rings together at all. Is that even right, the word solder? I'm not hip to words that are no longer relevant. I didn't know people still did that. Please, don't. Of course, everyone has different tastes and styles even if they are dated.  
There are more cons than pros. 
Personally, I don't always wear my engagement ring. It's beautiful and I love it but it's not always practical. I never take my band off unless it's being cleaned or when I work out. I clean my ring more than I work out, if you must know. 
When running errands or just lounging around the house, I don't wear my engagement ring. 
Everyone knows not to travel to certain places with a big diamond flashing from your finger like bait. If you solder your rings, you'd have to go without your rings or in your case, ring. I'd rather something happen to my band than my sparkly asscher cut ring. The thought alone makes me shake. 
If you choose to solder your rings together, do so. I'm not in favor of it. I like having the option of wearing both or just the band. 
I'm just a simple goddess that doesn't follow trends of decades past.  

Q I'm in high school and all my friends are getting tattoos to remember our time together. We graduate soon and we'll all be off to separate colleges and as my mom says, will eventually drift apart. I'd like to remember the best time of my life and my friends. I'm 18 so age isn't an issue. You'd get one wouldn't you?

A Well, age is an issue. Eighteen is so young. You don't see it now but one day you will. 
I won't lie. I do have two tattoos. I didn't get them as a pact to remember a time in my life, though I was about your age when I got them. I don't regret getting them ONLY because I was wise enough to not put them on places that are visible (unless I'm in the nude). I won't say where because I don't want to encourage you further. But if you must, don't do the whole ankle tattoo or a place where a future employer will see. It's (even more) trashy. Don't put the tattoo that will show if you wear a strapless dress. Basically, I'd like to say don't get one at all. 
To stay on point, you're getting one for the wrong reason. If there truly is a right reason. For me at the time there was. At least in my mind it was the right reason. You said you want "to remember the best time of your life." How do you know high school will be the best time of your life? 
Unless you're one of those girls who peaked in high school, then wait. 

If you want to remember your friends, remain their friends. I didn't go to the same college with anyone I went to high school with and I'm still close with some. Actually, my closest friends are those I went to elementary school with, those I met in college, and while out in the real world. I assure you, I felt no need to tattoo my body as a way to remember days of trading lunches or walking to class hungover while in college. 
If you want to remember your glory days in the years to come, go through your yearbook every now and then. Don't get a tattoo that says, "Class of 2013 Rocked!"
Hold off on a tattoo. If you still want one later, then get one that is unique not one that everyone else is getting. 
Wait. 

Q I just got bangs! I look awful. I thought they were in style. My hair stylist said to try it. Help.

A Because something is the latest trend doesn't mean it works for everyone. The blunt bang is certainly not for everyone. You have to go by the shape of your face, your hair type, and your general features. Not to mention your willingness to commit to upkeep. 
I, for example can't do bangs. You know, the bangs across the forehead. My hairdresser is smart enough to know what isn't going to work for her clients. Yes, that was me wagging my finger at your current stylist.
However, longer swept to the side bangs work for me because my face is round. The trendy Michelle Obama bangs wouldn't accentuate my features. They would instead make my face rounder.  
The good news is your bangs will grow out. 
Send me a message or pic of your new hair style or older pic and I'll tell you what would look best. Maybe bangs would look good on you but you got the wrong type.